The Pursuit of God

Serious Topics for Serious Christians

How Your Powerful Prayers Are Wrecking Your Relationship with God

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AUDIO VERSION: YouTube  Podbean

Now and then someone asks us for a prayer that will help them deal with some kind of demon issue.  In other words, they want us to recommend a potent spell that they can use to force supernatural beings to submit to their personal agenda.  Now if we had no fear of God’s wrath and no concern for the welfare of the souls who ask us for advice, we could make quite a pretty pile of cash dashing off a bunch of smart sounding baloney for Christians to pray.  Of course, their prayers wouldn’t do bumpkus to send those demons packing, but hey, we don’t have to tell them that.  The internet today is flooded with Christians who are trying to swap spells with each other while at the same time assuring each other that, yes, they are superior to both demons and God.  You see, you have to be claiming superiority over all supernatural beings before you can possibly claim that your prayers will be “effective.” Well, repeating a lie fifty billion times doesn’t make it true.  The truth is that you’re nothing more than an impotent fleck of a being who is totally dependent on God to sustain your existence.  You know, that same God who you’re always acting like you can control with your verbal spell casting.  And while we’re on the subject of tough truths, here’s another bitter pill that your ego is going to have to choke down at some point: demons are not intimidated by you.

So then, who wants to grow up and who wants to go on acting like a power lusting brat?  You see, you can’t have it both ways: if you’re not submitting to God when you pray, then you’re trying to dominate Him.  Where is the universe that you created?  Can you at least show us one demon or human being who you created from scratch?  No, you can’t, because when it comes to creating life from nothing, you just don’t have anything to offer.  Oh, but while you sit here unable to produce a single planet or star, you’re going to claim that you can dominate the One who spins off whole galaxies with a single thought.  Are you getting a taste for how incredibly arrogant this whole “I’m a potent prayer warrior” package is?  Would you walk up to the ruler of your country and try to physically force the man to eat a bowl of oatmeal or read a book?  No, but you have no problem trying to verbally manhandle God Almighty.  And then, when your obnoxious behavior gets you nowhere, you actually have the gall to think that He is the problem, thus you go into nag mode and talk to God like He is a whole lot stupider than you are.  Oh, but that’s right, you’re a reverent Christian.  Reverence never looked more snarky.

Now when you’re entrenched in the sorcerer mentality, your ego is ginormous, and there’s just nothing pleasant about having it stomped back down to the ground.  This is why so few Christians are willing to leave their spell casting ways: their egos are their gods.  Is that who you’re going to be—just another rebuking buffoon who goes around telling yourself you’re all that when you’re really a whole bunch of nothing?  You see, you are not superior to God.  You aren’t His boss, and He simply does not take orders from a fleck like you.  This whole routine of trying to “cast” prayers at demons and God needs to be thrown into the trash and your entire approach to prayer needs to be changed if you’re ever going to get where you need to be.  Because while you’re busy acting like God’s commander, you’re a million miles away from the soul attitude of submission.  Without sufficient submission, you can’t acquire salvation, and you certainly can’t mature after salvation.  Submission is the central theme of the serious Christian’s life, and if you’re obsessed with rebuking, commanding, and controlling supernatural beings, then you have clearly abandoned the concept of submission, and that raises the question of whether you’re even saved.

Do you know how many killer Christian prayer warriors today are on their way to Hell?  The stats are chilling.  The surprising truth is that Jesus doesn’t accept people who never stop bossing Him around.  You have to submit to God to be accepted by Him, and in the process of submission, there is no room for telling God what to do.

Now when you’re hanging out with other Christian sorcerer wannabes, you’re so focused on how awesome you are that it comes as quite a rude shock when someone talks to you like we doing.  We’re being harsh on purpose, because the last thing your fat ego needs is more pumping up.  You’re in a serious spiritual crisis, and we want to see you get out of it as quickly as possible.  Most Christian prayer warriors are beyond help because they’ve built their entire identity on the delusion that they have potent powers.  Topple the lie, and suddenly the awesome warrior sees himself for the pompous moron that he is, and well, ouch.  But the sooner we face the ugly truth about how much we humans long to dominate our Creator, the sooner we can turn to submission and experience our gracious God saving us from our own foolishness.

Now to help you see just how arrogant the whole potent prayer package gets, we’re going to pull some quotes from Christian fools on the internet who are all trying to encourage you to keep wasting your life clinging to lies and squandering this precious opportunity you have to actually please your Creator.  You need to learn to start looking past the ego pleasing statements and think about the theology that is driving the advice other Christians are handing you.  Your theology (theo = God) is what you believe about God.  Who He is, how He operates, and how He responds to you—you have already formed many assumptions about these things and how you pray reflects those assumptions.  But are your beliefs correct?  There’s absolutely no way to know unless you are asking God directly, and this is something most Christians never get around to doing.

Well, think about it: isn’t it a bit obnoxious for you to assume that you are correct in your assumptions about God when you’ve never talked to God Himself (see God Told Me: The Only Valid Basis for Faith)?  Here’s where many Christians will say, “Oh, but my beliefs are founded on the Word.”  Great.  Do you know what else the Bible says?  It says that Jesus is not God (Who is Jesus?).  It says that God has only ever loved Jews, not Gentiles, and that He only saved Gentiles to attract more Jews to Himself (see More Lies from Paul: God Loves Jews More Than Gentiles).  It says that anyone who sins can’t possibly be a Christian (see Salvation According to 1 John).  It says that all liars will burn in Hell.  It says that nothing we do matters because it’s all been predestined (see Understanding Divine Election: Jacob I Loved, Esau I Hated).  When you say that your beliefs are “biblical,” all you really mean is that you can yank one liners out of context to support things about God that you want to be true.  Fine.  We can use your same system to yank other one liners out of the Bible which will totally shred anything you try to claim.  But wait—if the Bible is “God-breathed”, how can it be used to support things which are not true?  Good question: and the answer is that the Bible is not God-breathed.  The Bible is a collection of documents which were written by many different men who were all in different places with God.  Some were spiritual rebels.  Some were true believers.  Many were very immature and delusional about who God is and how He operates.  So when you act like the book is the equivalent of God Himself, you’re being absurd.

Now wait—are we saying that nothing in the Bible is true?  No, because there is a ton of truth in the Bible.  The Bible is a fabulous tool for spiritual growth and learning about God but only when you are using it properly.  How do you use the Bible properly?  You rely on God Himself to interpret it for you.

When you read the Bible without talking to God, it’s like picking up some gossip rag and believing everything you read about an actor named Tom.  Oh look, Tom had an affair.  Tom does drugs.  Tom’s wife just gave birth to quintuplets.  Tom is dating a whale.  Tom lives on Mars.  There is no end to the absurdity that gets pumped out in gossip rags, yet they are enormously popular because people love slander and gossip.  Well, many Christians are treating the Bible like just another gossip rag: they pick it up and believe anything they read in it just because they like how that concept makes them feel.  Oh look, some guy in Psalm 91 says that God commands His angels to watch over us.  Nice theory, but that’s all it is until you ask God Himself if this is really what He does.  In Revelation, it says that the first folks to ever get a taste of Heaven will be those who were beheaded by Roman soldiers in early AD.  Apparently the physical manner in which we die matters more to God than our soul’s response to Him.  So if you were hoping to get in on that 1,000 year reign of Christ, you can just forget it. The Roman Empire is long gone, which means there’s no hope of you getting your head lopped off by Roman soldiers, therefore you’ll never qualify for the special millennial party (see Applying Revelation 20: Millennial Madness).

So when’s the last time you took a break from instructing God and invited Him to instruct you? When’s the last time you prayed something like, “God, I want to grow in my understanding of truth and improve the way that I treat You. If I’m currently clinging to any delusions about who You are and what You want, please show me, correct me, and teach me Your truth”?  How come we never see a prayer like this being recommended on Christian websites?  Because this kind of prayer requires submission and a humble acknowledgement that you could be too stupid to recognize that you’re putting your faith in a boatload of lies.  Prayer warriors don’t do humility, they do self-exaltation.  And while they’re busy acting like God’s commanders, they naturally refuse to listen when He’s commanding them.  Then you come along and just believe whatever these idiots tell you without even asking God Himself.  How do you think that’s going over with God?  Do you think He likes how you start getting all attitudinal with Him and then boast about how “effective” you are at making Him do what you want?  What is the applause of some Christian fool on the internet worth if God Himself is ticked at you?

In this world, you are going to be hard pressed to find Christian leaders who genuinely care about what’s going on between you and God.  Unfortunately, most Christians are just out to use you, trash you, and then kick you to the curb when they’re done sucking praise and money out of you.  You see, when you really care about the state of someone’s soul, you don’t encourage them in their delusions of grandeur.  You don’t say, “Hey, you awesome sorcerer in Christ, let me give you some tips on how you can get Christ to serve you.” This Christian obsession with spell casting is absolute garbage and those who encourage you to continue in it are only encouraging you to rebel against God.  Since we would like to see you thrive with God and not end up on the wrong side of His wrath, we aren’t going to downplay what an irreverent little twerp you’re being to try and tell God Almighty when and how to act on your behalf.

Now rebellious Christians abound in the world today, and many of them are working very hard to encourage you to follow their rotten example.  We found one such idiot boasting of a prayer that he’d cooked up to “break all curses, cast out demons, and protect yourself.”  Already you should be hearing a problem with the phrase “protect yourself.”  We’re talking about demons here: supernatural beings who could rip you apart in nanoseconds if God were ever to let them have full access to you.  Does a kitten have any natural defenses against a torpedo?  No, and you have no defenses against demons.  There are only three Beings who can protect you from demons: Yahweh, Jesus and the Holy Spirit.  As the Ones who created demons, these three Gods are the only Ones with the power to keep demons off of you.  But that’s not what our online Christian moron is going to tell us.  No, what he and countless others like him offer you is a bunch of magic spells that you can use to protect yourself.  Well, how does that work if you’re some total weakling?  It’s simple: your spells are all designed to force Beings who are stronger than you to do your bidding.  Don’t believe it?  Let’s check out some language.

In the Name of Jesus Christ, I break and loose myself and my family from all curses caused by habits, charms, hexes, spells, jinxes, psychic powers, sorcery, witchcraft, love potions, psychic prayers, violence, trauma, physical bondages, mental bondages, incest, illegitimacy, abandonment, rejection and divination, in the family on the mother and father’s side going all the way back to Adam and Eve.

I break and loose myself and my family from any vows I made; from any person or any occult or psychic sources, and any demons coming through the bloodlines.  I cancel all invitations made to unclean spirits.

Father, I break and renounce all evil soul ties that I have ever had. I renounce all these ties and declare them destroyed in the Name of Jesus.

I also renounce unbelief, doubt, lies, fear, hatred and anger.  I bind and cast out all related spirits.

I renounce, break and loose myself from all demonic subjection to my parents or any human being, living or dead, who has dominated me in any way against the will of God.  Thank You for setting me free.

“I, I, I, I”—oh, get over yourself already.  And after you’re done telling God all of the things you have broken, loosed, bound, cancelled, renounced, and cast out, you arrogantly thank God.  Thank Him for what?  For doing everything that you just took the credit for.  Because when you say, “Father, I break and renounce all evil soul ties,” what you really mean is, “Yahweh, get off the stick and break all of these soul ties that I’ve decided exist.”  And when you say “I renounce all these ties and declare them to be destroyed in the Name of Jesus,” what you really mean is, “Yo, Jesus.  I just said Your Name, so get it in gear and obey my command.”  Notice how you shamelessly take the glory for doing all of these things by using all of that “I” language, but then you end by giving God Almighty some condescending pat on the head and saying, “Good God.  Way to do what I have told You to do.  Here’s Your reward: I, the awesome sorcerer whose approval You live for, now thank You.  Don’t You feel special?”

“Thank You for setting me free.”

Really?  Because when did God ever say that He would set you free?  When did He ever agree to do any of these things that you’re so pompously taking the credit for?  Do you know what the Holy Spirit really says when we pray things like, “I cancel all invitations made to unclean spirits”?  He says, “Really?  Because I still see demons crawling all over you.”  Do you know what Yahweh says when you tell Him “I loose myself from all demonic subjection”?  He’s going to say, “Okay, then since you’ve obviously got this, I guess I’ll just drop My guard around you and let the demons have at you.”

I command Satan, to loose all natural resources, land, animals, money, the finances of people who owe us money, and all the things you have stolen from my family that are ours through the blessings of Jesus.  Father, please send Your angels to bring these things back to us.  In the Name of Jesus I pray.  Amen.

Wow, what a cheeky thing you are.  And just how, in your deluded brain, did Satan acquire all of these goodies?  What do you think God was doing while Satan was taking over the place and binding up the land and animals?  Oh, and this entitled attitude you’re displaying by claiming rights to the blessings of Jesus is priceless.  And notice how you tell Yahweh to send His angels to retrieve the stolen goods for you. You know—the same Yahweh who was apparently taking a nap when Satan threw everything into chaos.  Can you really trust such a dolt of a God?  And since demons and angels are the same kind of being, what makes you think angels are up to the task of conquering the mighty Satan?  You’ve already declared that Satan has utterly triumphed over Yahweh and Jesus by doing a bunch of things that They didn’t want to happen.  Oh, but you’re confident that mere angels can handle this problem.  In other words, you think angels can outperform God.  Nice.

Here’s a reality check: there is no list of blessings that Jesus has promised you.  You only think there is because you read the wishful thinking of that idiot known as the apostle Paul—the same guy who teaches that Jesus is some incompetent dolt who is locked in some endless struggle against powers who He can’t quite find a way to beat.  It’s Paul that you’re usually quoting when you quote long lists of “who I am in Christ.”  Paul—the guy who teaches that Christ is a human, not a God, and that Christ will one day be forced to stop reigning over anything and publicly admit that He’s subservient to the great Yahweh (see The Great Offense of Paul: Rejecting the Divinity of Christ).  When you promote Paul’s words, you’re actually quoting the words of a Christ bashing blasphemer.  But you don’t realize this because you don’t ever read the whole Bible—you just pick and choose one liners that please your ego.  And you never ask Jesus Himself what He thinks about Paul’s garbage teaching, you just exalt Paul as brilliant even though the man was not even a Christian (see Debunking the Conversion of Paul).

Real Christianity is not the worship of Paul or a book.  Real Christianity is the worship of the only real Gods in existence: Yahweh, Jesus and the Holy Spirit.  But this isn’t what sorcery obsessed Christians are going to teach you, because in their minds, they are the gods who rule over Gods.  Ask yourself who is serving who in this little set of instructions:

Father in heaven, please send your Holy Spirit to fill us up in the Name of Jesus.

This is supposed to be a prayer for Christians—and a Christian by definition already has the Holy Spirit.  Ah, but if you take a closer look at all of those insulting worship songs we sing to the Holy Spirit, you’ll find that Christians think it is God honoring to constantly claim that God has flat out abandoned them, and then stand around begging and pleading for Him to “come anew” and “fall afresh”  (see Worship Songs from Satan: Fall Afresh).

As a human, you don’t ask for something that you already believe you have.  This means that all we have to do is listen to what you pray for, and we can tell volumes about how much you don’t trust God.  Take this bit about you asking Yahweh to send the Holy Spirit to fill you up.  You can’t pray something like this unless you first assume the Holy Spirit isn’t with you, and you can’t believe He isn’t with you unless you believe He has ditched you since the last time you claimed to have Him.  So then, God says He’s faithful and that He always stays with you. But you say that God is unfaithful, fickle, and constantly ditching you.  Clearly you and God have two opposing views of reality, but in your unbounded arrogance, you naturally talk as if your view of reality is the correct one, thus you pray this insulting prayer to Yahweh to make the Holy Spirit come back to you. And of course you tag on the Name of Jesus, as you always do, because you think that just by flinging around the J-word, you can make your orders impossible for God Almighty to disobey.  Somehow “arrogant” just doesn’t cover it.

Father in heaven, I ask for legions upon legions of angels from heaven in the Name of Jesus to station around us.  Angels of the Lord, at Jesus’ command, attack every unclean spirit in Jesus’ Name.

Of course you ask for legions of angels.  You have zero understanding of what a single angel is capable of, so in your ignorant foolishness, you figure “legions” should be sufficient.  And since you’re so comfortable bossing God Himself around, it’s a cinch for you to boss around angels as well.  And because your ego is as large as the galaxy, you don’t even hesitate to assume that all angels everywhere will rush to obey your command.  You’re so high on your own magnificence, that it’s just obvious to you that angels view you as their superior commander.  Notice how you directly instruct them in this prayer.  And what exactly are they to do?  Obey the instructions of your subordinate, Jesus.  In other words, you’ve given angels your permission to listen to Jesus. Wow.  And how did you arrive at the incredibly conceited conclusion that angels actually needed your clearance to listen to the God who created them? Well, this is just how conceited you are.  Apparently you think that until they hear from you, “angels of the Lord” would simply ignore the fact that the Lord was telling them to do something.  Are you following the logic here?  Your prayers reveal your beliefs and what’s being revealed in these prayers we’re looking at is some pretty shocking stuff.  And yet the prayers we’re quoting here are extremely common in the Christian prayer warrior culture.

I bind the principalities, powers, rulers of darkness, spiritual wickedness and all the strong demons in the Name of Jesus.  I command all demons not to transfer, go exactly where Jesus wants you to go and do not come back.

Well, if you have to give angels permission to listen to Jesus, clearly you have to do the same with demons.  And here you are: telling demons to go exactly where Jesus tells them to.  But notice how you add “and do not come back.”  Once again, you are flaunting your superiority over Jesus by treating your command as more effective than His.  Because according to you, demons have a habit of blowing Jesus off, thus you feel it is necessary for you to take their option of disobedience away from them.  And of course you have the power to do this, because you’re superior to Jesus.  From the way you pray, we can tell that you view Jesus as some lower ranking officer in your army.  As your subordinate, you tell Jesus how to command the rest of the troops, and then you tell the troops that they’d better listen to Jesus because you said so, and you are the top dog.  See how it works?

SELF-DELIVERANCE

Now according to the idiot we’re quoting here, there are all kinds of potent commands you can use to drive demons out of yourself.  Let’s check out a few:

In the Name of Jesus, I separate every foul spirit from this person’s soul in accordance with the word of God in Hebrews 4:12.

Ah, Hebrews.  The author of Hebrews is another Christ basher who paints Jesus as some dolt who had to come to earth and learn what it means to obey God.  The Hebrews guy also rejects the Divinity of Christ, oh, but why should that small detail cause us to view him as less than wise?  And according to this joker:

The word of God is living and effective and sharper than any double-edged sword, penetrating as far as the separation of soul and spirit, joints and marrow. It is able to judge the ideas and thoughts of the heart. (Hebrews 4:12)

Well, no, “the word of God” is not alive and it doesn’t judge things.  Anytime we start deifying things other than God, we’re wandering into idolatry. Even though the author of Hebrews wrote his epistle long before anyone had ever heard of our modern Christian bibles, fools in the Church today will tell you that Hebrews 4:12 is a reference to your modern Christian Bible, thus the book itself is endowed with Divine powers.  Well, no, it isn’t, and as we said earlier, there are plenty of statements made in the Bible which are just plain wrong.  So when you pray something “in accordance with the word of God,” which part of the Bible are you referring to?  The part where foolish John says that Satan rules the world (see The Ruler of Our World: Is it God or Satan?)?  And just how will demons be driven away by the writings of men who were attributing them far more power than they actually have?  Are you seeing what a fool our online prayer teacher is?  This guy is just making up a bunch of guff and there you are, repeating it without even thinking.

I cut every foul spirit from this person with the sword of the Spirit.

Oh, so now the Holy Spirit is just an object that you use to hack at demons with?  Or are you trying to say that the “sword of the Spirit” is the Bible, therefore you’re claiming to be beating demons up with a physical book?  Either way, you’re talking like an idiot.

Demons, I command you to come out of the mouth now and never come back in Jesus’ Name.  Go to the pit! (Repeat) Up and out! (Repeat)

I send Holy Spirit fire to burn you 1,000 times hotter than Hell in the Name of Jesus. Fire from head to toe! (Repeat)  Hotter! (Repeat)

I send Holy Spirit fire all over your body in the mighty Name of Jesus. Fire from head to toe! (Repeat)  Hotter! (Repeat)

I send Holy Spirit fire all over the room, the floor and the ceiling. Fire from head to toe! (Repeat)  Hotter! (Repeat)

Yes, this guy is serious.  These are prayers he recommends for self-exorcism, and you can find the same kind of theatrical foolishness on many Christian websites.  Now we’re not told how many times to repeat these particular phrases, but the fact that any repetition is being recommended demonstrates the utter lack of faith that this guy has.  Let’s face it: Christians are famous for treating their all-knowing God like He’s very hard of hearing.  We’re always repeating ourselves and somehow we think that shouting will help God tune in because we clearly don’t believe He’s listening very closely.  But now let’s examine the theology that is driving these prayers.

When you talk like this, you’re not only declaring supremacy over demons and the Holy Spirit, you’re also claiming to have the power to open and shut eternal dimensions.  Notice how you command demons to go to “the pit.”  Why “the pit”?  Well, this guy is getting his terminology from the very erroneous ancient Jewish belief that the place of the dead was located in the bowels of the planet.  The foolish Jews believed that the sea was evil because it contained physical portals to the underworld.  In other words, swim to the ocean floor and you might find actual gates that open to Hades.  Jesus is accommodating this foolishness when He describes demonic creatures emerging from the ocean in the book of Revelation (see Applying Revelation 13: Two More Beasts & 666).  But is Hell literally located in the middle of our physical planet? Of course not.  Heaven and Hell are entirely different dimensions than this physical one that we’re walking around in, and since you as a human have no idea how to get to either one of them, it’s more than a little asinine for you to command demons to go to the pit.

All of the descriptions of Heaven and Hell that you find in the Bible are metaphorical.  Jesus isn’t being literal when He describes a burning lake of fire.  And by the way, the term Hell isn’t even in the Bible.  The word Jesus actually used is Gehenna, which was a transliteration of the valley of Hinnon.  This was an actual ravine located on the southern side of the city of Jerusalem where Jews would offer their live children to idols. Babies were placed onto the super-heated arms of metal statues, where they were then burned to death while parents stood around weeping in anguish.  Later this site was turned into a garbage dump, where refuse was kept continually burning.  It was because Gehenna was so strongly associated with suffering and repulsion that it became a great metaphor for the misery we will experience if we end up on the wrong side of God’s wrath in eternity.  And because the real Gehenna was always on fire (either to burn humans or to burn trash), we end up with the “lake of fire” imagery that we now associate with Hell.  But is any of this literal?  When we die, are we going to end up in a valley near Jerusalem?  Of course not.  Will there be physical flames?  No.  So you see, when you try to act like some know-it-all sorcerer by talking about legions of angels and demons going into the pit, the truth is that you don’t have the first clue what you’re talking about.

What we know from our Gods is that there are two possible destinations for humans to end up after they die, and one of those places is going to be terrible, while the other will be much nicer.  Beyond that, we really have no idea what to expect.  But we do know that our Gods are the Ones controlling who goes where, plus They are the Creators and Sustainers of all dimensions.  All of this makes it more than a little arrogant for you to act like you can transfer supernatural beings into the dimension of your choosing just because you want to.  Where do you get off exalting yourself as the controller of Hell or anywhere else?

The term Hell is just a label we use to refer to the negative side of eternity.  Yet in the prayers that our Christian nimbus puts out, he talks as if there are literal flames in Hell, then he acts as if he has knowledge of how hot those flames are by ordering the Holy Spirit to manufacture literal flames which are 1,000 times hotter than the flames of Hell.  Really??  The Holy Spirit is not a flame thrower, He is God Almighty.  And given what an ignoramus you are on the subject of demons, how can you even justify this assumption you’re making that they are affected by heat?  Demons are non-human creatures, not pieces of paper.  And on what basis do you say that demons have heads and toes or any anatomy at all?  The language in these prayers is utterly ridiculous.  And if you think that “Holy Spirit fire” is such a destructive thing, why on earth are you trying to spread it all over the walls and ceiling?  What kind of dingdong are you?  And what happens if this fire gets out of control?  Will you then call out for the “Holy Spirit hose” to come and spray holy water that is 1,000 times wetter than rain?

Why are you telling demons to come out of your mouth?  Because this is the main portal you use for putting things into your body, so you arrogantly assume that demons must operate the same way you do.  And by the way, how did you get so infested with these demons if you’re such a kick butt prayer warrior?  How is that you can tell three Almighty Gods what to do but you can’t keep simple demons at bay?  Are you awesome or not?  Well, the truth is that your incredible power is nothing more than an arrogant delusion which is why it keeps—ahem—failing to show up.

This is the great hypocrisy of Christian prayer warriors and intercessors: while they strut around claiming to have the power to command God and control the supernatural realms, they constantly demonstrate how impotent they are by having to pray the same “ultimate” prayers over and over again.  If you were really as potent as you claim to be, you shouldn’t have to keep crying out “hotter!  hotter!” as you try to light your room on fire.  But the sad truth is that you’re just a pathetic wannabe who will never get your hands on one iota of real power.  And while demons are laughing at how stupid you are and angels are totally ignoring you, the Gods you’re always bossing around are intentionally keeping you at arm’s length.

Every evil spirit that hears my voice, I command you to tell the truth in the Name of Jesus.  Tell us your name in the Name of Jesus.  How long have you been in there? What have you been doing inside? How many are inside? 

This is great: let’s stand around interviewing creatures who are known to be masters of deception, because of course anything a demon says must be the honest truth (see Rebuking Demons).  Are you getting a feel for how stupid you sound to God and demons when you talk like this?

Every evil spirit that hears my voice, I command you to attack the strongman. Do not stop in the Name of Jesus.  I order civil war in the Name of Jesus.  Evil spirits attack each other in the Name of Jesus.  Destroy your own kingdom.

Apparently the moron who came up with these prayers thinks “the strongman” is the leader of some group of demons.  Here he tells you to order demons to fight against each other, because obviously the wills of other beings are like soft clay in your hands.  You can’t get another human to move out of your way on the highway, but you can get demons to fight against each other.  My, how do you do it?  By flinging around the Name of Jesus, of course.  To Christian prayer abusers, the Name of Jesus is the potent tagline that they can slap onto the end of any carnal request and all beings will be forced to give them what they want.  Here’s more hypocrisy: while you treat Jesus like your Servant, you act like His Name is ultra-potent.  In other words, you pray as if Jesus’ Name is more powerful than Jesus Himself.  After all if Jesus was worth anything, He wouldn’t have these demons walking all over Him, stealing His blessings, and wrecking His Creation.  Obviously Jesus is pretty worthless when it comes to holding demons back, and that’s why we’re all stuck having to listen to you yammer on and on.  Well, if Jesus is such a wimp, how can His Name be worth anything?  Because you say it is, and you’re far too conceited to accept that you could ever be wrong about anything.

I command you to look at Jesus and do what He tells you to do. Look at Jesus! (Repeat) Do what He tells you to do! (Repeat)

Wow.  It’s a good thing Jesus has you around to play the part of His mommy and make His own creations pay attention to Him.  Is there any end to your awesomeness?  Wait for it…

I loose burning judgement and destruction upon you in the Name of Jesus.

See?  You’re not just the god of God, you’re the judge of all created beings.  In that Bible that you claim to worship, Jesus said that He and Yahweh would be the Ones passing out judgments, but here you’re grabbing the gavel out of Jesus’ hands and doing His judging for Him.  And on what basis are you condemning these demons?  Well, they’re annoying you.  And since you’re the center of the universe, obviously anyone who irritates you deserves to be eternally damned.  See how it works?  You are the god of God.  You are the one we all revolve around.

Father in heaven, send power from the third heaven to destroy these demons in the Name of Jesus.

I trample on you demons and shatter your being, in the Name of Jesus.

Warrior angels, hook into the demons and rip them apart.  Send the demons to the pit in Jesus’ Name.

Warrior angels, flog the demons and choke them out.  Send the demons to the pit in Jesus’ Name.

Now hold on—things are really getting ridiculous.  If you’re so potent, why do you have to yammer on and on like this?  If your prayers are as effective as you claim, why do demons even exist? Why haven’t you simply “shattered their beings”?  What happened to all of that burning judgment that you loosed?  Where is that destruction you declared in the Name of Jesus?  If the Name is so darn powerful, why isn’t it working?  How is that you ever need to ask for anything more than once if God always does what you want?  Has that Holy Spirit fire fizzled out?  Did you mess up by ordering flames only 1,000 times hotter than Hell when you really should have gone for flames that were 10,000 times hotter?  Well, no, it shouldn’t matter because while the Holy Spirit is going spastic with His flamethrower, you claim to have shattered the very beings of demons.  Who is left for those warrior angels to hook, flog, choke, and rip apart if you’ve already shattered all of your foes?  And why do you have to keep ordering demons to go into the pit?  Isn’t anyone listening to you?  No, they’re not, and as you rebuke yourself into exhaustion, it becomes painfully obvious what a pathetic wuss you really are.

GETTING BACK TO TRUTH

Your great power exists only in your mind.  Your Gods are not bowing down to you, demons aren’t afraid of you, and angels aren’t even listening to the pompous noises you make.  While Christian prayer warriors and deliverance guides crank out the daily prayers and lists of potent commands, the very fact that demons still exist proves how useless the advice of such people really is. And while they’ll tell you that it’s because of your sin and lack of faith that you have problems in the first place, they’ll never be able to explain why all of those demons that they bound, cursed, shattered, and threw into the pit are still among us.  They also can’t explain why false religions are thriving, why dark magic remains so popular, and why the world remains a mess of suffering and sin.  Well, we can explain it: no one is listening to these pompous fatheads.  Their prayers are so much wind, and the Gods who are actually running this world are refusing to change Their agendas to accommodate a bunch of self-absorbed humans.  Because let’s face it: Christians who pray like this aren’t interested in pleasing God.  They’re just trying to use God to please themselves.  These people care only about having their own way all of the time.  They want all created things to adjust and submit to them instead of recognizing that they need to adjust and submit to their Gods.  And given the utter lack of respect that these people show for God, what do you think will happen to your own relationship with God if you start praying like they do?

For all of you Christians who are looking for that magic prayer that will make your current troubles disappear: there isn’t one.  You are not a sorcerer, you have no powers, and no supernatural being is going to bend to your will.  So if you really want to get somewhere with God, you need to stop obsessing over being comfortable in your earthsuit and ask God to help you discover what reverential submission is.  God demands submission from you, and you’re not going to get anywhere without it.  God says that you were created to revolve around Him, and the sooner you align with that reality, the better off you’ll be.

Demons don’t just happen to you.  God intentionally sics them on you and they’re not going anywhere until He decides to flick them off (see The Spiritual Benefits of Being Trampled by Demons).  Your earthsuit craves evil because He designed it that way on purpose (see The Great Gift of Sin: Why Our Depravity Gives Us Hope).  Your life is never going to be perfect (see Soul Before Earthsuit: Understanding God’s Priorities).  God simply isn’t interested in giving you everything you want, because your personal happiness just isn’t at the top of His priority list.  But while God does not revolve around you, He does graciously offer to bless you with an increasingly better existence if you fully submit to Him as the Supreme Authority in your life.

Fully submitting to God means you stop bossing Him around and you decide that pleasing Him is a whole lot more important than pleasing yourself (see What it Means to be Aligned with God).  This means that if God decides it pleases Him to put you through some miserable trial, then you submit to His will for your life and you ask Him to have His total way with you without trying to tell Him what His way must look like.  There is simply no room for spell casting, rebuking, binding, or commanding in the serious pursuit of God, because this is a pursuit in which God’s pleasure is viewed as the ultimate reward while our own pleasure is considered expendable. As long as you’re trolling for prayers that can make God do what you want, you are trying to dominate Him, and this is a form of spiritual rebellion.  Rebel against God for too long, and the day will come when He’ll throw up a permanent barrier between you and Him which no amount of declaring will be able to take down (see The Eternal Cost of Defying God: A Warning for Christians).  Is that really where you want to end up?

FURTHER READING:
Prayer Warriors: Disrespecting God & Proud of It
Identifying False Teaching About Demons: Three Easy Tests
Four Ways to Identify False Teaching in the Church
Spiritual Warfare in the Church: Delusions vs. Truth
Deliverance Ministries: Scamming You in the Name of Jesus
Better than Exorcism: Dealing with Persistent Demon Problems
Asking & Aligning: The Two Stages of Prayer
Christian Prayer Groups: Why God Isn’t a Fan
Why We Won’t Pray For You

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