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When we find ourselves saddled with some very intense desires that are going completely unmet, the resulting psychological torment can become so extreme that we start thinking of some very extreme solutions to our problems. In the case of men who are trying to stay sexually pure in a sexually perverse world, the thought of surviving a life of celibacy can start sounding utterly impossible. Since God has made His hatred of sexually perverse activities so glaringly clear, what other options do you have? If you can’t stand being deprived of sex, and you can’t get your sexual needs met through morally acceptable channels, it seems quite logical to try and do away with your sex drive altogether. The fact that God has designed your anatomy in a way that makes the source of your troubles so easily accessible only makes the temptation of self-mutilation seem that much greater. Why not get castrated? Wouldn’t this provide an instant cure to your problems and let you finally escape this hellish existence? If these are the kinds of questions you are starting to mull over in your mind, this post is for you.
There are many ways to solve any problem, but not all of those solutions are wise. For example, if your friend is saying things that upset you and you want to escape the sound of his words, you can either leave his presence, or you can gun him down. Both of these solutions will immediately accomplish the specific goal of silencing your friend’s voice in your ears, but accomplishing the goal is only one part of the picture. Every solution comes paired with short and long term consequences. Unwise solutions result in consequences that are worse than the original problem was. For example, if you simply leave your friend’s presence, he might get in a huff, and you’ll then have to deal with that. But among good friends, huffs are usually short-lived affairs that can be resolved. If you gun your friend down, however, you will be permanently ending the relationship along with your access to everything good about it. Then you’ll probably be arrested for murder and at least end up in jail, if not executed. Both solutions to this problem came paired with negative consequences, but one batch of consequences was far worse than the other.
Before you can make a wise decision, you need to think beyond the immediate goal of resolving the problem which is currently pressing on your mind, and consider what kinds of consequences your potential solutions will bring into your life. Every solution has consequences, and often the solutions which work the swiftest result in the most severe consequences. For example, you can shoot your friend a lot faster than you can physically walk across a room, but as we’ve discussed, shooting him will result in consequences that are far worse than the original problem.
So what kinds of consequences come with self-castration? Well, considering how much you don’t understand about how your own body works, how wise is it to go lopping off organs which you know are producing chemicals which are critical to your body running properly? To go chopping off your testes in an effort to stop feeling plagued with lust is like popping open the hood to your car and ripping out the part of the engine that’s making an irritating rattling noise. Without even bothering to consider what that part’s function is, you toss it into the trashcan and drop the hood. You then expect your car to go on functioning normally, but of course it isn’t going to, because you’ve just taken away a critical piece of its machinery.
Your testes aren’t just a decoration, they are a very important part of your body’s machinery. Just because it is possible for men to live without their testes doesn’t mean it is wise for you to sign up to be one of them. Men can live without legs and arms, also. They can live without colons, teeth, and eyes. But every time an important part of the body’s machinery is lost, all the benefits of that part get lost as well. In your current frustrated state, it’s easy for you to see your sex organs as nothing but a source of trouble and grief. But they are much more than that. Your testes produce that all important hormone called testosterone—a critical substance which helps your body regulate bone mass, fat distribution, muscle mass and strength, and the production of your red blood cells. It also effects mood, liver function, and your ability to metabolize carbs and cholesterol. It helps with your immune system’s response, it monitors hair growth, it helps you sleep well. Those are just a few of the things that we’ve discovered so far, but much of testosterone’s role in your body remains a mystery at this time. What we do know is that when men don’t receive enough testosterone, they begin having some serious physiological problems. Their body’s machinery starts malfunctioning because it is missing a critical element.
Now because God is such a Genius, He’s equipped you with your own personal testosterone making factory that goes with you everywhere you go. He’s adjusted the output of that factory to be what is right for you. Every man produces a different level of natural testosterone—a fact which drives doctors crazy in trying to diagnose the source of certain problems. So if you think you can just ditch your natural machinery and easily compensate for it with some manmade substitute, think again. Sure, the man with a missing leg can learn to hobble about on a prosthetic limb, but who would pick such an option if he doesn’t have to? The prosthetic limb can be adequate for getting through life, but it will never be as good as the natural one.
When it comes to understanding the great mystery of how our bodies work, we humans always think we know far more than we do. We go butchering God’s machinery in order to accomplish one short sighted goal, and then we end up in a far greater mess when the alterations we made result in all kinds of unexpected problems.
As a man, the bottom line for you is this: God has fixed it so that you must have testosterone to function properly. And with testosterone, comes an increased interest in sex, which is the one thing you’re trying to get away from right now. But we’re talking about one negative factor amid a sea of critical positives. And that one negative factor could instantly morph into an extremely positive factor should God choose to alter your life’s circumstances. Since God is a Being who is obsessed with change and variation—a Being who works in seasons and chapters and who never keeps things the same forever, how can you justify this morbid conclusion that sex will always be a hellish topic for you? Maybe you feel like every woman on the planet has rejected you, but somewhere in your mind you know that’s a gross exaggeration of reality. Maybe you’re struggling with being sexually attracted to targets which God says are not acceptable, such as other men, animals, or children. Okay, it’s a mess, but is God bigger than your mess? Are you going to leave room for Him to work some good out of this or are you going to toss up your hands and say, “I know You created the universe and all, but I’ve decided my sexual problems have You totally stumped.” In your soul, you know that God is more than able to fix whatever your current issue is. The bigger question is will He? You want guarantees, naturally, and God isn’t giving them to you. But silence is not the same as God saying “no” so stop reading into His silence and stop making Him out to be some unloving Ogre who doesn’t care about your misery. Of course God cares about your misery. God also delights in heaping blessings on your head just because—what do you think Heaven is about?
God didn’t bring you into existence just to get some sadistic thrill out of tormenting you, so let’s try to get things back into perspective here. You’re extremely frustrated. God gets that. But God also gets that He loves you insanely, which is why if He wasn’t driving you crazy about sex, He’d be driving you crazy about something else. All of this aggravation has a very important spiritual goal behind it. Just as testosterone is a lot more than just a sex drive booster, your trials in life are about much more than making you feel miserable. God wants a close relationship with you, and getting there involves you agreeing to be totally dominated by Him. He gets you there by presenting you with opportunities to submit to His program for your life even when that program is something you intensely dislike.
We humans are very good at looking at how rotten we feel today and projecting those rotten feelings out forever. We then conclude that our lives will always suck this bad, therefore there’s no point in trying anymore. But our lives are not like a bad car that gets permanently stuck in the lowest gear. Our lives are a series of purposeful tests and there are breaks between those tests. This trial you’re in will not last forever. Nothing in this world stays the same. Everything is in a constant state of flux. God isn’t asking you to submit to entire life of celibacy, He’s asking you to accept not getting perfect sexual gratification right now. These are two very different goals, and you only have enough empowerment for the second one, which is why demons are always pushing you to go for the first one. They want you to leap to all of these crazy conclusions that God is planning to always keep you in abject misery. They want you to believe that He’s some Ogre who gets His kicks out of plaguing His creatures with unfulfilled desires. But no, this is not at all who your Creator is and you know it. You know that this is the God who died on a cross for you. This is the God who created you for the purpose of eternally thriving in your relationship with Him. You were created for the purpose of experiencing joy, not misery. The misery is only a tool which God is using to increase your capacity for joy. Let’s have some faith in His abilities, shall we?
God has set life up to be such that joy and misery both come through the same door. You can’t have joy without some degree of pain, but God says that if you will submit to His plan for your life, that pain will enhance your capacity for joy, and you’ll eventually end up in a place where there is only joy all the time. The other option is to close that door through which joy comes in order to escape the pain that sometimes comes with it. If you do this, you’ll end up in a place where only misery exists. This is a principle which holds true in both our relationships with other humans and in our pursuit of God. When we close the door on people because we’re afraid of getting hurt, we end up lonely and bitter. When we close the door on God because we’re afraid of what He’ll put us through, we end up starving on a soul level.
Sex is a door through which some very great joys can come. The greater the potential for joy, the greater the misery that can come through that same door. To try and avoid the misery, some men slam the door on sex and decide that they’re done waiting for God to bring them any real joy in that department of their lives. This is what you’re trying to do when you consider mutilating your body in order to escape the torment of an unfulfilled sex drive. This is a plan that is guaranteed to fail. God doesn’t let us go around His system. There’s one door, and we need to decide to keep it open. So don’t go trying to trash the beautiful machine that God has given you. Instead, ask Him to help you learn everything He wants to teach you through this and to help you connect with His great love for you. Sex was God’s idea, and when it’s done His way, it’s a truly wonderful blessing. Why should you deny yourself the opportunity to experience that blessing by giving up now in the midst of the battle? Give God the chance to finish what He’s started with you. If you do, He guarantees that you won’t be sorry.
Gender Dysphoria: Confronting the Lies that Fuel the Crisis (Help for Transsexuals)
Broken to Thrive: Help & Hope for Pedophiles
Guidance for Priests: When to Break Your Vow of Celibacy